The Simpsons' European Vacations
America's favourite family have been coming to the Continent since Season One.
It was on December 17, 1989, that the world was introduced to Homer, Marge, Bart, Lisa and Maggie Simpson – well, that’s if you don’t include the ‘shorts’ which appeared on The Tracey Ullman Show before then which, for the purpose of this article, I won’t.
Over thirty-odd years and around 700 episodes later, barely a day passes without someone remarking that it isn’t the show it used to be, and indeed it isn’t.
However, even at its worst, The Simpsons is better than a lot of shows at their best. And besides, the solid gold that was Seasons 3 to 10 means that any survey of the cream of TV is incomplete without a nod in the direction of Springfield.
Not that all of the Simpsons’ adventures have taken place in that town. In addition to trips to New York and New Orleans – among other US destinations – Homer and Co. have racked up the air miles. Locations they’ve jetted off to include Japan, where they wound up in the clutches of Godzilla, Australia, where they pissed off the entire country, and Brazil, where the Rio tourist board threatened Fox with legal action after the show portrayed the city as being overrun with rats, kidnappers and disease-infested monkeys.
By and large, the family’s European excursions have created far less fuss and a lot more fun. Before we begin our tour, I should point out that this gazetteer doesn’t included excursions featured in Treehouse of Horror episodes since they aren’t considered canon.
Nor has the first episode of Season 22 made the cut, what with Krusty the Clown’s visit to the Hague’s International Court of Human Rights being very much ‘Elementary School Confidential’s’ B-story. Similarly, Raging Abe Simpson And His Grumbling Grandson In ‘The Curse Of The Fighting Hellfish’ is absent since the scenes in Belgium only appear in flashback.
So, with the rules established in true Principal Skinner fashion, let the fun – and the learning! – begin!
France
Episode: ‘The Crepes Of Wrath’, Season 1 Episode 11
Blackboard gag: ‘Garlic gum is not funny.’
Couch gag: The family jump on the couch at the same time, forcing Homer to the floor.
Plot: Bart is sent to France as part of a student exchange only to find himself enslaved by unscrupulous winemakers. Meanwhile, Homer and Marge open their home to Adil, an Albanian boy who proceeds to spy on the nuclear power plant for his government.
Notable observations: Bart – “So basically, I met one nice French person.”
Sights seen: On the way to the vineyard, Bart passes through landscapes modelled upon celebrated works by Monet (Bassin Aux Nymphéas) , Manet (Le Dejenuer sur l’herbe), Van Gogh (Wheatfield with crows) and Rousseau (The Dream).
Famous friends: The Gendarme is voiced by the award-winning French journalist and author Christian Coffinet.
England
Episode: ‘The Regina Monologues’, S15 E4
Blackboard gag: None, alas.
Couch gag: The Simpsons are squeezed onto the couch via a Play-Doh Fun Factory.
Plot: After coming into some money, Bart treats the family to a trip to England, with Grampa tagging along in the hope of catching up with his war-time sweetheart Edwina.
Notable observations: Homer – “We’re big shot tourists from everyone’s favourite country, the USA. We saved your ass in Vietnam and shared our prostitutes with Hugh Grant, so give me some free maps and none of that dry British wit.”
Sights seen: St Paul’s, the Albert Hall, Harrods, Carnaby Street, the London Eye, Hyde Park Corner, the West End, the Old Bailey, the Tower of London and Buckingham Palace where Homer narrowly avoids running over the Queen.
Famous Friends: The gang are greeted at the airport by Tony Blair and bump into Sir Ian McKellen and JK Rowling over the course of their visit. Meanwhile Frasier’s Jane Leeves appears as Edwina while reality TV’s Evan Marriott (aka Joe Millionaire) plays himself.
Trivia: It took eight months to persuade Tony Blair to appear on The Simpsons, and when he did, some bloke called Alastair Campbell insisted that his lines be changed in order to promote British tourism.
Scotland
Episode: ‘Monty Can’t Buy Me Love’, S10 E21
Blackboard gag: ‘I have neither been there nor done that’
Couch gag: The family form part of a circus kick line.
Plot: Bent on becoming as popular as the Richard Branson-esque Arthur Fortune, Mr Burns asks Homer how he can win the hearts and minds of the great unwashed. When none of his employee’s suggestions work, the power plant owner sets himself the task of capturing the Loch Ness Monster. And since the show’s never been to Scotland before, Groundskeeper Willie’s along for the ride!
Notable observations: Willie – “Aye, that is my ma and pa. They own a tavern hereabouts. They still have the same pool table on which I was conceived, born and educated.”
Sights seen: Just the majestic loch, neighbouring Urquhart Castle and a local pub.
Famous Friends: Spinal Tap and Saturday Night Live’s Michael McKean stars as the Howard Stern-esque Jerry Rude.
Trivia: Much of the Nessie material is informed by the original King Kong. As for draining Loch Ness in order to get to the monster, readers will be thrilled to learn that local councillors have outlawed all such dredging operations.
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