Epic Movie Flops, Part 1
From the infamy ("Infamy!") of Cleopatra to the tragedy of Terry Gilliam's Baron Munchausen via the boys who cried Wolfe...
Cleopatra (1963)
Who’s responsible Joseph L Mankiewicz (All About Eve, The Barefoot Contessa, Sleuth)
The talent Elizabeth Taylor, Richard Burton, Rex Harrison
The pitch Queen of Egypt Cleopatra seduces Roman general Mark Antony over the course of 243 minutes.
Expenses Taylor demanded $1 million to replace first choice Joan Collins. She then contracted meningitis, which caused a two month delay during which time original director Rouben Mamoulian jumped ship, swiftly followed by stars Peter Finch and Stephen Boyd. After the production moved to Rome to help Taylor recover from a bout of pneumonia, actresses playing Cleopatra’s handmaidens went on strike to demand protection from the amorous Italian extras.
Professional opinion “Whatever was interesting about it clearly ended up somewhere else: on the cutting room floor, in various hotel rooms, in the newspaper columns…” The New Yorker
Battle damage US distributors set out to sue 20th Century Fox, claiming that Burton and Taylor’s on-set affair made the picture impossible to market to suburban America. Fox boss Darryl Zanuck responded by trying to sue the adulterous lovers.
Redeeming features Carry On Cleo later made use of the sets.
Cost $44m
Take $26m
Loss 18m
Bonfire Of The Vanities (1990)
Who’s responsible Brian De Palma (Scarface, The Untouchables, Snake Eyes)
The talent Tom Hanks, Melanie Griffith, Bruce Willis
The pitch Millionaire financier Sherman McCoy comes a cropper in the Bronx while on a night out with his mistress. An adaptation of the celebrated novel by Tom Wolfe.
Expenses De Palma was given $1 million simply to agree not to make another picure while Bonfire was in pre-production. A pre-Seven and Shawshank Redemption Morgan Freeman was paid a seven figure sum for a glorified cameo. Griffith disappeared mid-shoot to get her breasts enhanced.
Professional opinion “A disastrous misjudgement” The LA Times
Battle damage Colossal, thanks to journalist Julie Salamon being on hand every day to witness the egos and the excess. Her memoir, The Devil’s Candy, became a bestseller, while De Palma’s next project was the dismal Raising Cain. The subsequent Carlito’s Way marked a return to form.
Redeeming features Not many. Among the worst literary adaptations this side of Thomas And The Magic Railroad.
Cost $45m
Take $16m
Loss $29m
Ishtar (1987)
Who’s responsible Elaine May (The Heartbreak Kid, A New Leaf, Mikey And Nicky)
The talent Warren Beatty, Dustin Hoffman (each of whom were on $5.5 million), Isabelle Adjani
The pitch Two lounge singers booked to play the Ishtar Hilton get up to all sorts of shenanigans amid the sand dunes and political upheaveals of the Middle East.
Expenses On learning that his children had left their favourite toys back in New York, Hoffman chartered a jet home to retrieve them.
Professional opinion “One can’t help but wonder whether the camel was the only blind creature who had something to do with this picture” Daily Variety
Battle damage Transplanted Brit Sir David Puttnam, head of Columbia Pictures, received his marching orders. Director May escaped without sanction and made a successful return to screenwriting (The Birdcage, Primary Colors).
Redeeming features Only if you like empty star vehicles and scene stealing camels.
Cost $50m
Take $14m
Loss $36m
The Adventures Of Baron Munchausen (1989)
Who’s responsible Terry Gilliam (Time Bandits, Brazil, Fear And Loathing In Las Vegas)
The talent John Neville (a stage actor with virtually no screen acting experience), Robin Williams (unbilled), Oliver Reed
The pitch The life and times of Baron Karl Friedrich Hieronymus von Munchausen of Bodenwerder - explorer, Russian cavalry officer and the greatest liar the world has ever known.
Expenses “I wanted to work with cinematographer Guiseppe Rotunno and production designed Dante Ferretti,” says Gilliam of the budget-busting decision to shoot in Rome. “What I should have done was ship them over to England. I should have known Munchausen was too complicated to take out of the environment I knew so well.”
Professional opinion “Whereas the source is adroit at slipping between fantasy and reality, Gilliam’s fiction can’t even handle a flashback” Monthly Film Bulletin
Battle damage Despite the back-to-back failures of Brazil and Munchausen, Gilliam continued to find regular work in Hollywood. John Neville, on the other hand, was last seen playing seventh banana to Michelle Pfeiffer in Dangerous Minds.
Redeeming features Loads. In fact, Munchausen isn’t only the best film on this list; it rivals pretty much anything in Gilliam’s filmography for breath of vision and manic originality.
Cost $46m
Take $8m
Loss $38m
I quite like Ishtar, until I think of the talent involved - it could have been great, really. Munchausen is great, though. Which is nice.